The Yardsalers Experience Fame

It was a big day today, Readers. We were recognized as "Those Blogger Girls" for the first time. As in, "Aren't you those blogger girls?" It was at the local, annual sale where last year we found a stuffed beaver for $200. The beaver was gone but our reputation was not.

Freakin' A! This is the beginning of something big!

As Laura said, the morning started without much hope. There was really a lot of rain. And thunder. And lightning. The Van-o-Dreams actually hydroplaned a couple of times on the highway. Here is a photo I took while I should have been driving safely:

Soulard was a total bust. Total. But dang the houses are pretty! PLEASE, SOULARD, TRY AGAIN NEXT WEEK!! We will come! I will spend hundreds of dollars! Laura will spend $6!

We left Soulard and headed to Mascoutah. (Soulard is 20 minutes west of our homes. Mascoutah is 20 minutes east.) We had been on the road for over an hour and had yet to lay a finger on one single rusty/crappy/broken/used object that was for sale. So when we finally arrived at this sad, little sale we were freakin' ecstatic!

It was seriously pitiful. Normally we wouldn't have even stopped. But we were so desperate for a sale we trudged through the rain to inspect the lady's 8 measly items. I think I spent 50 cents for a weird dress I don't like and that won't fit me.

But, thanks-be-to-god, things picked up and we found some more sales. The Mascoutans have garages, you see, so rain will not deter them from selling their fine wares!

After all that time on the road, over and hour going to Soulard then another 30 minutes searching for the rare open garage, I had to pee really bad! Now, you must know, it is very bad form to ask to use the bathroom at the home of a yardsaler. Maybe if you have a small child with you it is permissable, but in that case you should apologize a number of times, roll your eyes at the limited volume of the youthful bladder, and pretend you aren't going to go pee immediately after the kid relives herself. But did I ever have to GO! So when we arrived at the sale below I threw all propriety to the wind and begged for a potty break. Reluctantly, the proprietess allowed me inside.

I wish I knew their names because they deserve high praise for their potty-hospitality (hos-potty-tality?) I will call them Man-who-made-Excellent-Washer-Games, Lady-with-a-Very-Purple-Coat, and Girl-who-lives-in-a-Very-Old-House because those are the things I remember most about them. Thank you, MWMEWG, LWAVPC, and GWLIAVOH. I might have exploded had it not been for your kindness.

Do you collect anything, Reader? Coffee mugs? Dolls? Bunny figurines? If so, you understand the joy of the hunt, the satisfaction of amassing a large collection of one thing. I will introduce you to a man (well, just his collection, really, because he was out collecting this morning as we were admiring his work) who collects Hotwheels. His two-car garage is a shrine to Hotwheels. Apparently the Hotwheels guys release new cars each year. This Mascoutan man collects them ALL. Here they are:

What I appreciate most about this guy is his commitment. He made all these display racks himself. He hung unpackaged, individual cars on tiny little nails around the window. He has a custom little shelf for cars. This guy is an organizational savant. My hat is off to you, Mister Hotwheel Man.

We finally found Old Town Mascoutah. It was just what we wanted. Here's the truth: suburban developments are fine but their stuff is the same from house to house to house. And it is all the same stuff I have already in my own house. We all get it from Target. Not until you get to the shabby, small, older parts of a town do you get any good junk. I'm just sayin'.

On Main St. in Mascoutah we found a tent sale hosted by a church group. Mascoutah Assembly of God maybe. I lost the paperwork. They were very sweet and generous. They had a food sale, like all self-respecting church sales will, but they were giving away food. To get an authentic Panera Bread Company bagel all you had to do was read John 3:16 or something. Excellent PR for the Assembly of God, right? Except bad news. The bagels were already a day old last Wednesday. A+ for generosity, D+ for taste. These are the well-intentioned ladies distributing the yucky bagels:

This sale was a big score for us, however. I bought this chalkboard. Guess how much it cost?:

Samantha bought four of these adorable chairs, handmade by a now deceased member of the Assembly's congregation:

Henry found this magnetic/dry-erase/grid board:

And most importantly, we met a new friend and champion: Uncle Mustache!

CHECK. HIM. OUT.

Henry urged me to take his picture but I was too shy at first. But the kind ladies of the Assembly encouraged me so I chased him down and asked if I could take his photo. He was happy to oblige me. Then he presented me with his business card:

That number is 618-806-5674 Folks!

Apparently his wife does not enjoy the crazy mustache so he incorporated the mustache as his "brand" so now he can never shave it! Brilliant marital strategy, Uncle Mustache! Plus, using "Uncle" makes you sound very friendly and trustworthy! According to his card, Uncle Mustache will gladly: paint, wallpaper, insulate, frame, poor concrete, roof, pressure wash, remove trees, replace windows, install drywall, weld, hang shelves, wire things, plumb, and install flooring. Here he is doing a bit of pro bono work on our chalkboard so we could fit it in the Van-O-Dreams:

We got a little short on time today for two reasons: 1. We pissed away an hour driving to Soulard, and 2. Henry and Sam had an appointment at the Apple store at the Galleria. We had to pass on this inviting thrift shop. We figured we could return on a regular day (not Sunday or Monday) and shop at our leisure.

Honorable mention goes to our last sale of the day, a repeat estate sale close to home, hosted by Phil and Mrs. Phil. Their uncle invented this clever use for Grandpa's walker after he kicked-the-bucket:

Demonstrating the walker/garbagecan is Angie, our guest yardsaler visiting from Florida.

Here is Phil selling Laura a metal paper towel dispenser which really floated her boat. If it were Tuesday I think Phil would have earned himself more than the $3 asking price! See the twinkle in her eye?

Tune in next week, Readers. Tell your friends about us. Click on "Follow This Blog". Fame is within our reach. We can smell it.

"Why, this isn't Tuesday, is it?"

Today began rainy and stormy. We decided to head to Soulard to escape the weather, but the Soulardians, who have no garages in their excellent old townhouses, were unable to display their treasures. We turned around and headed east to try Mascoutah, who was also having a city-wide sale (see pronunciation guide below). Now, Nancy will also blog about today. So some information may be repeated. Bite me.
Mascoutah is a mix of subdivisions, that after discussing in the car, should be named, instead of what used to be there (see my prior post about Estates of Plum Hill), for what is there now; for example, Clear-Cut Destruction Manor or Erosion Village. Nothing good was to be found at the subdivision sales and we asked the proprieters many times where the old houses were. They all claimed there were no sales in the historical section. Only one knowledgeable homeowner, at whose sale I bought the excellent sale in which the title was inspired and discussed below, was able to tell us where to go (and by us, I mean brilliant Samantha, who is so good at navigating it makes me look like a blubbering idiot).
Nancy is holding a clothespin holder festooned out of 2 scrap pieces of wood glued together at an earnest boy scouts' sale. The sale wasn't earnest, just the boys.


This delightful hold house has an outhouse and well. Excellent.

The title of this post comes from a book I picked up for 5 cents today at a yard sale in Mascoutah (pronounced muh-skoo-tuh by everyone but me who says muh-skoo-taaaah because it sounds so much funnier that way). The book is entitled Facts of Life and Love for Teen-Agers by Evelyn Millis Duvall published in 1956. This book is chock full of necessary, life skills for teen-agers (hyphen included in book's title), such as (in discussing "petting" (yes, it is actually called that) and wishing to stop any further sexual contact): "Hazel takes a different tack. When a date's hands begin to wander into the no-man's land which she considers untouchable, she firmly removes the hand and says with suprise, "Why, this isn't Tuesday, is it?" The humor, "corny" as it is, is usually enough to stop all but the most exploitative of boys." Yes indeed. Girls, all you need to do when a boy is getting into no-man's land is remind him you are only slutty on Tuesdays. It's Monday? Hell, no! Thursday? What are you thinking? Tuesdays, damn it! Tuesdays!

Another gem: "Alyce was telling her younger sister how to say good-night to an amorous boy friend who seemed all set for a more intimate expression than she felt wise. Alyce said, 'Just take the situation in both your hands, squeeze warmly, and skip in through the door.'" Yes. Just take "the situation" (ha!) in your hands and warmly squeeze. Apparently Ms. Duvall is using the word situation to mean a gentleman's hands and not "the male organ" (p. 32; emphsis not added). Girls, to slow down a hot and lusty date, all you need to do to slow things waaaaay down is give a gentle squeeze to your man's agile fingers. Unless of course it is Tuesday.

The advice doesn't stop just there. Oh no. Here is some well-heeded advice for that little monthly visitor: "No ten-mile hikes, or twenty-mile canters, or marathon rollerskating just then, thank you" No, Ms. Duvall. Thank you. How would I have ever known not to go on that 26.2 mile rollerskate I had planned?

And of course, no teen-ager book worth its salt in the 50s was complete without the birds and the bees discussion. Here is Ms. Duvall's vital contribution to educating the lustful youth of 1956: "Sperms are deposited in the vagina during coitus (sometimes called sexual intercourse, or marriage relations, or mating". Ok. 1. Yes, she wrote sperms. As in the plural. 2. Marriage relations? 3. Mating??????!!! Really, what else can I add here?

Onto the yard sale!

The picture below is a pair of Frye (Frye!) boots I was longing for, only to find out after I put my naked foot in this boot to try it on, that it was much too big. I then frantically wiped my foot on wet grass as they were really dirty.

Yay! Samantha is back!

Here is my mom Angie, who accompanied us today. Here is Nancy taking a picture of Mr. Moustache man.

Here is Mr. Moustache Man, kindly taking the giant chalkboard apart.

Here is Sam holding a giant $100 bill and trying not to get decapitated by the giant chalkboard.

Good reader, I am exhausted. Hours upon hours of junky treasure, lots of caffeine and little food, and naughty little books means I need a nap. But really, what better use of time could one have on a Saturday? We are hoping the Soulard sale is scheduled for next Saturday, as another adventure in yard saling awaits. Until then, good reader, keep saling.

You always remember your first time

Sara was a yard sale virgin until today. Here she is below, in green, with our good friend Jackie, who was hosting a yard sale. As you can see, we had the pleasure of adorable children accompany us today. Jackie is a yard sale proprieter-pro, as evidenced by her excellent canopies protecting her items from the ravages of unpredictable midwest weather.



Sara, her cutie Dominick, me, my mom Angie, and Hudson piled into my sweet Odyessy ride to hit Belleville Friday sales. Here is a happy group of propieters: Debbie, Patty, and Larry. They kept smiles on their faces even through the rain.

Here is Ted, another congenial proprieter. He came up with yet another ingenius use of a ladder; this time as a coat rack. Way to go, Ted! Props for ladder use #734.

Here is the largest collection of diet books I have ever seen at a yard sale.

And here it is; the piece de resistance. Angie is holding this most excellent game of Sexual Trivia. I didn't open it to see what kinds of questions were asked. There are so many things I can write here. Use your imagination.

Dominick and Hudson scored big with beanie babies today. Evidentally Dominick has been eyeing Sawyer's extensive yard sale beanie baby collection with longing, and I am happy to report he is well on his way to topping that collection. Among his treasures were: 2 dinosaurs from the St. Louis zoo gift shop, a kangaroo with a joey, and many more. He was such a good sport. Sara was so much fun to have along. She needs to come with us more often!

Tomorrow is a big day. Since Nancy was preoccupied today, I have tasked her with the all-important job of deciding which city-wide sale to attend: Mascoutah, Ferguson, or Soulard. Don't let me down, Nan. I am counting on you. Until tomorrow, good readers!

Junque!

I am a little off-topic this week, but I have to tell you about my day at Junque, my favorite shop on Earth.

Here is the front door:

It's crazy. I don't know how people find this place. I only know about it because Laura told me. I think Tammy Geiger told her about it. There is no advertisement that I know of (until now!) and obviously no signage. Sometimes on Saturday he puts an old bicycle out front to catch the eye of would-be buyers.

He.

He is Regan Young ("Ree-gan"), my hero in junk management. From what I can piece together, he demolishes buildings for the salvageable architecture and makes stuff out of the dregs, which he then sells. In the mean time, he stores the stuff in a warehouse in the Lemp Brewery district, which he rents. You can go to the warehouse on Saturdays from 10-5 and buy the stuff... unless it is something that he is "saving" for one of his "projects". I think he has a lot of projects in the works. There is a lot of stuff he refuses to sell me.

This warehouse holds easily one million pieces of junque. The junk merits a "Q" because it is all special. It is all beautiful. After just a few moments in Junque, you can see that every single piece in the warehouse has been carefully chosen, cleaned, and categorized.

Here is the door knob section:

And here is the old-time-heating-grate-department:

When you go, be sure to see the weird-keyhole-plate-thingy-area. These things are pricey:

Today I went with a goal in mind: I needed a dining room table. I recently rearranged the furniture (surprised? Ha!) and have freed up an entire room... the room being the original dining room of my 1930s house which, until recently, was our family room. Until today, all we had for dining was a kitchen breakfast nook which, for 7 people, isn't quite enough on Thanksgiving or Easter.

So I had in mind a table that would involve something creative and unusual as the base, with a 60 inch round piece of table top glass atop it. Junque was the only place I could imagine finding such a creative base for my imaginary table. Maybe I could have found something good at my second favorite store in the world: the concrete and metal garden shop on 255 in Dupo. More on that later.

I got lost going to Junque, as I always do. Once I leave I64 I am a hopeless retard. Usually I see Gus's Pretzels and I'm home free, but today I turned the wrong way. Dork.

I pulled in the back way... I should say that if you have never been to Junque but you have ever watched NYPD Blue, you would think this place is exactly where people get raped and beaten. It is an old brewery complex. Lots of warehouses and gravel. Lots of scary loading docks and abandoned buildings. But it is my favorite store on Earth, remember?!

So I pull up and start salivating. There, in the "recently acquired" pile, are three clawfoot bathtubs and various elevator components. Mmmmmm. Junque-y!

Regan was hard at work moving cool, old stuff around with his friend "Crash". Crash's real name is Richard. He is very tall and looks a little bit like Sean Penn. He had on some sort of biker t-shirt and a head wrap that implied a love of motorcycling. He told me I could call him "Dick" or "Asshole" but I opted for "Crash".

So Regan tells me to go on in, make myself at home. I like to imagine I am his favorite customer. On the day that I first met him, he told me I looked like his old girlfriend. I sort of figure I have a special place in his Junque-y heart, right? I try not to flirt too openly, but I know he has a crush on me.

I spent 2 1/2 hours in Junque. I looked at every piece... twice. I planned a number of wonderful dining room tables only to have Regan talk me out of them because the components were too impractical or too treasured to part with.

But right away I saw this:

This, which I found in the random-things-you-could-use-as-table-tops department, is a 4x6 piece of table glass with a gorgeous beveled edge. Bingo! Now all I needed was a base.

I found this gorgeous (ok... sort of yucky and dirty and old) crate. It was full of marble scraps and Regan did not want to part with it, but I knew it was my perfect table base.

There was much discussion and haggling. Crash was summoned for a second opinion. They doubted its stability. They doubted its practicality. My stomach started to rumble. Pizza arrived. Apparently, Regan decorated/supplied a family of pizzerias and has some sort of special relationship with them. They delivered three pizzas which were SO FREAKIN' DELICIOUS I might have to move to Plaza Frontenac. Here are the remains of the meat pizza:

It was like a bacon cheeseburger with extra cheese served open face. The pizzeria is called "Sugo's" and we should all go there immediately, making them rich beyond their wildest dreams.

Finally, I put my foot down. "I want the damn crate!" I said.

No. Not really. I sort of had to beg. But Regan acquiesced and we loaded the glass and the crate into my car. Once home, Laura helped me unload the 600 pound glass and crate. I vacuumed the crate and soaked that sucker with Old English. Then I gave it a spray of polyurethane. Voila!

How freakin' awesome is THAT?!! I know... really, really awesome.

There was more: a marble triangle, a coveted span of copper... and the kicker?? Crash (Richard) is the owner of my second favorite store on 255 in Dupo!! Here is a rare photo the two creative geniuses together:

It was an unforgettable day, Readers. I need a day of rest before the excitement of the 50-Family sale in Soulard this Saturday.

Until next time, please keep in mind that my birthday is July 7 and this is all I want:

Skivving -- May 8

No photos from today. Sorry. Here are some highlights:

• Twenty 65 watt indoor flood bulbs for my basement can lights which seem to burn out frequently just to spite me . $3.
• Three rainbow haired troll dolls. $1.
• One sweatshirt sporting Tweety Bird riding a motorcycle. $1.
• Four long tab top curtains which I actually needed. They were on my list of things to buy at Target. I figure by paying $15 at a garage sale I saved at least 75, right?
• Twenty 6 oz juice glasses. $2.

and finally,

• The motherload of fine clothing. Coldwater Creek, Chico's, some Kohl's brand. At least 6 beautiful skirts, 2 trendy dresses, 3 fancy blouses, 4 brand new t-shirts, 5 more misc tops, 3 pairs of pajamas. $40. Freakin' A.

We are in high yardsale season, Readers. Check back every week!

Dupo, take two

This item confused me. I thought it was some strange animal butt pillow at the sale. When I look at this photo, however, I can see they are cats and I was looking at the back. Oh well. I had low blood sugar, too much caffeine, and I was freezing.


The gentleman below is named Charles. He is a very nice retired teacher who was selling this school filing cabinet, which I am lusting after. He wants $200 for it, which, as anyone knows who reads this blog, is much too pricey for me. I offered him $50 with my phone number. Charles, call me. I will go up to $55.

This is a strange house with half an upstairs. Our dear friend Samantha is an architect. Sam, what the hell?

Ok, so the picture below is in the wrong order. It is an excellent cabinet that I offered to purchase and was turned down. All the cool things in the garage below this picture were not for sale. Dora items were for sale (nice propieter gave Hudson a free Dora book! Thanks!); brilliant old items=not for sale.

Here is the nice man's garage (nice man: if you are reading this, let us know your name in comments below! Thanks!) His wife was equally nice. This is the best set up for a yard sale, really. Cold? Windy? Rainy? No problem-plenty of room in the excellent garage! He also had a great chalkboard which wasn't for sale, but offered to let me see the man cave in the upstairs. He told me nothing was for sale in the upstairs, though, so I declined, because really that would just make me sad.

So there you have it, good reader. My recap of delightful Dupo. Stay tuned for Nancy's montage of Belleville skivs.

Dupo!

Dupo-really, by the name alone, would you think it would be a yard saling treasure? This little village close to somewhere (really, I got lost just finding the sales so you wouldn't expect me to know where in the midwest it is located, would you?) was (once again like Millstadt) chock full of wonderfully friendly, generous proprieters, junky items for purchase, and plentiful sales. My new favorite sale is the old village-wide sale, where the houses are smack dab close and you can park and walk and every time you turn a corner your eyes delight in the voluminous sales.
We started late this morning, as I was alone (Nancy had to chaperone a sleepover attended by roughly two dozen 8-10 year old girls; Samantha is away again with newly-returned-from Quatar-husband and son). I thought I was escaping with nary a child in sight (it being Mother's Day weekend and all), but alas, my two youngest cuties decided the allure of free or nearly-free toys was too compelling.
Here is Campbell with the world's biggest wreath at a multi-family sale. It was the windiest yard sale I have personally ever attended; the temperature was 46 when we started this morning but with the wind chill, it must have been closer to 30. It was freezing and my boys were such troopers.

So I can't figure out how to move pictures. I am a loser. The one below is supposed to go at the end, but reference the previous loser statement. Here is Hudson with our haul.....everything you see (on the couch) for $5.

This was a fantastic church rummage sale at Sacred Heart Church in Dupo. Friendly service, cheap prices, plenty of merchandise!

This is the largest basket of fake bread and cheese I have ever seen. I asked the propieter (who turned down a photo op posing with her basket) about it and she said she was into decorating and she would regularly change the breads and cheeses. I think. Did I mention it was freezing? I was having a hard time concentrating on anything other than maintaining my body temperature.

Here we are back at the church rummage sale with my two happy boys. This car bed collasped (the top part anyway) right after I snapped this photo. Not to worry as I believe it is supposed to come off to allow a mattress to be placed inside. It goes without saying this was a desired item by the boys, which I quicly vetoed. Not to worry about it receiving a good home; we saw it in the back of someone's pickup moments later.

I have to start a new post to get the rest of my pictures as I am unable to fit them all on one. See Dupo, part two!